Happy 4th everyone!  The 4th of July is a day to feel blessed.  Only in America can a man work hard taking AP classes in high school, so that he could one day attend an excellent college, write a thesis and get a liberal arts degree, so that he could one day wake up late and write about junk food on his blog.  <beaming>

The one thing I love about the 4th of July is the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Championship in Coney Island. Joey Chestnut, of San Jose, California, has the record at 68 dogs in 10 minutes.  But before Chestnut won the past four years, a skinny asian man named Kobayashi dominated the field.  He revolutionized competitive eating, winning the contest six years in a row.  He inspired my own competitive eating attempt (more on this in the future).

Kobayashi split from the professional eating circuit when the owners of the “league” refused to let any of their eaters do non-sanctioned contests.  Kobayashi notably attempted to force his way on stage last year only to be arrested.  This year, it’ll be different.  He’ll be hosting his OWN hot dog eating challenge at the exact same time as the Nathan’s one on the rooftop of 230 FIFTH in NYC.  More on Kobayashi after the review.

The 4th of July is a PERFECT time to review this little treat I’ve been saving:

The Money Shot

NATION!  Stephen Colbert’s has a new ice cream and it is Ben & Jerry’s Americone Dream.  Well, I guess it’s not new, per se, having come out in 2007.  Colbert recently geniusely lampooned his own ice cream in response to Jimmy Fallon’s new ice cream flavor Late Night Snack.

Ah Colbert, you handsome man

What better way to celebrate America’s birthday than with the man, the America, himself – Stephen Colbert.  I once had a friend who tried to argue to me that Colbert’s commentary, though humorous, was reflective of his truly held Conservative beliefs, and commended Comedy Central on taking such a bold risk.  I poked this friend in the eye in response.

Tastes like a Ben & Jerry's original

I’ll give old B&J credit this time – the combo of flavors in this tub of ice cream have not previously been replicated.  Vanilla Ice Cream with a Caramel Swirl and Fudge Covered Waffle Cone Pieces?  It’s like you took a Drumstick Ice Cream Cone, smashed it up, and put it in a tub.  And that’s NOT a bad thing.

Mmmm that IS colder than Valley Forge!

Still 16 oz.  Still one serving size in my mind.

Ok...I'm listening

After opening the carton, I was immediately intrigued.  The vanilla ice cream was peppered with fudge covered pieces.  I hate it when ice cream claims to be loaded with ingredients and you find three M&Ms in the whole tub.  This initial presentment didn’t disappoint.

We have lift off

Swirly goodness!

The first spoonfuls were actually perfect – PLENTY of fudge pieces in every bite, and lots of caramel swirl to go around!  And the taste – damn good.  Like, REALLY damn good.  I was kinda surprised – the description didn’t sound THAT great.  But for anyone who likes a sweet ice cream with a little salty edge and some crunch – this was like heaven.  It felt like I WAS eating a Drumstick Ice Cream cone!  Awesome.

A little dent

This time around, I did NOT eat the whole carton – just my serving size.  See?  A small dent.  A small 270 calorie dent.

Good job, Ben & Jerry’s!  You did Colbert Nation proud.

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Wonder what Kobayashi’s been doing since his split with Major League Eating?  This excellent Deadspin article catches up with him since last year.  As I stated before, he changed the competitive eating landscape; as the article states, even with Chestnut reigning supreme, people only remember
“that skinny Japanese guy.”

I hope he beats those bastards today, as he horfs down his own load of hot dogs with the Nathan’s contest playing simulatenously on a TV behind him.  God speed, eat freak.  Do us proud.

Have a safe Fourth everyone.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy