Junk Food Nation, I ride the subway a lot here in DC. There is an unusual phenomenon going on here that is completely tilting me: overpoliteness.  Why would overpoliteness make me upset, you ask?

For anyone who has ever ridden a subway, you know the rules during rush hour or any other crowded time… you enter the car and try to push in as much as possible, such that the massive hordes behind you can get on the train too.  Here in DC, the idea of moving to the center of the car to alleviate crowding near the subway car’s exits is commonplace.

DC also has thousands of professionals who are healthy and vibrant, and who are happy to stand and defer their seat to someone who needs it.  Pregnant women, old people, etc.  It’s very polite, and I commend the District citizens for doing so.

As a result of the above two polite practices, however, something weird has happened … now people are too proud to sit. This plays out in two ways:

1) THE “SEATS ARE FOR THE WEAK” PROUDNESS: You get on the subway car, and its crowded.  And people are pushing down the aisle to the center, and there are open seats…but NO ONE IS SITTING.  Why?  Because everyone’s thinking, “Oh I don’t need to sit, seats are for the weak.” Meanwhile, the entrance is getting clogged, and everyone is tightening up…but STILL NO ONE IS SITTING.  Do you know how EFFING RIDICULOUS it is to see a crowded subway car with a ton of people standing, even almost falling over its so crowded, but there are empty seats on the train??? I just want to shout “YOU ARE ALL MORONS.”

Enough of my ranting – the other way after the jump. Junk Food Nation, I don’t typically blog about homemade treats, but today, I had to. HAD TO. Featuring my first homemade Junk Food: Oreos Covered in Chocolate Chip Cookie!

These were made by my friend L.G., and were delightful.  I’ll shut up for the next few pictures, and catch up with you on the flip side.  Yeah, I know a lot of the pictures look the same.  I was obsessed; sue me:

The Money Shot

Blue Steel

Ferrari

Le Tigra

Magnum

Yep, Oreos Covered in Chocolate Chip Cookie.  And let me tell you, they tasted amazing. They were, dare I say it, better than deep fried Oreos.  These were just cookie on cookie food violence, in a good way. Crunchy and crumbling outside, and once you got inside, chocolatey and creamy.  Nice work, L.G.  I’ll have to get the recipe.

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2) THE “REJECTED SEAT OF NO RETURN” PROUDNESS: This occurs when the people who SHOULD sit decide to be too polite, making everyone else feel bad about themselves.  The situation: someone sees a person who they think ought to be sitting down on the subway.  Graciously, they get up and offer the seat to this individual.  The offered-to person, who I’m sure in some convoluted way takes this as an insult (Why do you think I need a seat? Do you think I’m weak, jerk!?) rather than a gesture of politeness rejects the seat.  NOW, the offeree is stuck – he/she doesn’t sit back down, because they feel silly.  NO ONE ELSE feels like they can sit in that seat, because that’s rude – the person didn’t offer THEM the seat, after all.  So what are you left with?  Offered but rejected empty seats, and a crowded subway car.  Ridiculous.

What do you think of the cookies, or have you ever been the victim of people who are too proud to sit?  Tell me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy