Review: Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos & How So So So Wrong I Was About the Lakers
Junk Food Nation, as of this morning, the LA Lakers are 24-28, a full 16 games out of first place. And I’m pissed off about it. Honestly, I don’t really care – I’ve documented plenty of times on this blog how I don’t LOVE basketball. And the Lakers are hardly a team I root for, or even care about. So why am I angry? Because I like to THINK I know a little bit about sports, and I was SOOOOOOOOO wrong about the Lakers.
Back in October, I made predictions for the 2012-2013 NBA Season. Among those predictions? THAT THE LAKERS WOULD WIN THE NBA FINALS. Ugh, where did I go wrong? Oh wait, I know where:
1) I ignored the fact that Dwight Howard is NOT LeBron James. I thought that since Howard had the talent to be the best center in the NBA, that any team that had him and Kobe would be amazing. Ooof. I forgot about Howard’s injury history, something James did not have. I forgot that his stringing along of the Orlando Magic was worse than even James’ “Decision.” I forgot that he was heading West, where the big men were bigger than in the East. Like a pitcher switching to the AL from the NL, I should’ve recognized the signs.
2) I felt like I wrote off the Celtics as too old last year only to be proven wrong, and was overly cautious/generous with the Lakers. Essentially, I ignored the age rule – that players DON’T get better with age at a certain point. The Celtics were an anomaly, in that they were a great core nexus of players last year. Heck even this year, the Celts, despite their injuries and age, are at least still in 7th place. I shouldn’t have banked on the Lakers having the same chemistry in Year 1.
So what am I left with now? A Lakers team that has a soft center, an aging superstar, a legend point guard who has no one really to pass to, and a Euro former-center who is sitting on the bench or on the injury list. Plus Metta World Peace. And I thought these guys would beat the Heat? Over OKC?? Ugh – what was I thinking??
Today’s junk food: Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos!
Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos: The Money Shot
These Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos were brought to my attention by Twitter friends @NickRovo and @KingRhino. And I FINALLY found them at Safeway. Now, here’s the thing: I *KNOW* how these are going to taste already. I’ve eaten, and reviewed, PLENTY of Oreos in my day. Did Oreo REALLY think that adding a TON MORE CREME inside would make these an actual “Limited Edition” Did they think this “unique” quality would really reel in the suckers?
Well, it did. I bought two packages. I am a huge dolt.
Pretty sure Creme is gonna win in this one
Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos are apparently part of this Cookie vs. Creme promotion going on at Oreo.com. They even had a Cookie vs. Creme Super Bowl commercial:
Here’s why the commercial doesn’t make sense to me: WHY IN THEIR RIGHT MIND ACTUALLY CHOOSES THE COOKIE OVER THE CREME?? Oh really, the near-flavorless COOKIE is the best part of an Oreo? You’d just LOVE it if this was really just a package of wafers?? LIES.
You already KNOW these aren’t good for you
Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos had 180 calories for every two cookies, and…ah, why bother. You know these are bad for you. You know the ingredients are gonna be filled with sugar and oils and other stuff that you shouldn’t be having but that taste OH SO GOOD. You just want to see how much creme are actually IN these suckers, right? Well, read on, Nation…
TADA!
Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos have so much creme inside, they sort of look like mini-Whoopie Pies, almost, don’t they? Let’s take a closer look:
WHOA
Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos almost look fake. They almost look like I personally pried open some cookies, stuck them together, designed a fake package, and now am trying to sell these to you like an actually product. But, they are real. They do exist. And this is a sh*tload of creme. Holy moly.
Spilling out the sides
So…much…sugar
I snapped some of these Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos in half, just to see how the structural integrity was … as my fingers applied enough pressure to break the cookie, the creme just started to spill and squeeze out the sides. Ridiculous.
Side by side comparison
Above, you will see how these Limited Edition MEGA STUFF Oreos (left) stack up to both Double Stuff (middle) and regular Oreos (right). A dramatic difference. If Double Stuff is twice the creme as regular Oreos, it’s safe to say that MEGA STUFF is basically three times as much creme. Blargh.
Somewhat absurd
My friend Nick commented that one of these days, Oreos will evolve to the point where the tray will just be a big row of creme with two cookie wafers bookending the row. I wouldn’t be surprised. These MEGA STUFF Oreos were massive.
Still, how did they taste? DAMN GOOD, of course! I mean, it’s still just an Oreo, whether Golden or not, and all that’s different is that my mouth was blasted with thrice the sugar than normal. It didn’t taste bad, that’s for sure. And I was able to lift whole cars with the sugar rush, I think. Or maybe I passed out and dreamed that. Someone get me some insulin.
Anyways, thumbs up, Oreo, for this ridiculous ridiculous snack.
PURCHASED AT: Safeway
COST: $3.00 each on sale
Thoughts? Please comment below or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. Also, you can always email me at junkfoodguy@junkfoodguy.com. Let’s hang.
Sincerely,
Junk Food Guy
Discuss - 20 Comments
Not sure if you saw my math tweet but they are in fact triple stuffed. Oh and for liking the wafers, there was a time in my life when I only ate the cookies and hated the creme=p.
@Nick: You love the creme now, though, no?
@Eric, Love is a strong word but I do enjoy it a lot more, especially the peanut butter one.
Declaring a preference between the cookie and the cream would be like declaring a preference between my left arm and my right arm. I need both of them, and the whole package only works with both. You need the cookie to provide the crunchy contrast to the creme, and vice versa.
The Double and now Mega Stuff Oreos upset this delicate balance, making the cookie as a whole into a sea of cream on which the discs float like lift rafts attempting to give the eater a moment of solidity amidst the sugary white blankness.
I am not a fan of Double Stuffery and would be less of a fan of Mega Stuffery.
This year’s Lakers would have been great in 2009!
@Lindemann: Sea of creme – I totally agree. Knock it off, Nabisco. And LOL re Lakers in 09
I’ve always thought Dwight Howard was kinda overrated. For all all this supposed talent he has it’s never really materialized into much. And with all his diva tactics down in Orlando, he’s lost any likability he had in my book (which wasn’t much to begin with).
As for the Oreo thing, yeah, I don’t get it either. Oreos are painfully average to me, and the only thing even bringing them to that level is the creme. I’d be very surprised if the cookie actually came out as the winner. And when I see these Mega Stuff Oreos, I still just want to combine two of them together, even though I’m pretty sure a sextuple stuffed Oreo would kill me.
@Devin: I agree – he is TOTALLY unlikable now. What happened? It’s like what happened to Brett Favre – so wishy washy and then when he finally made a decision everyone was just like FINALLY
When I eat Oreos, I bite off the top of the 1st one then the top on the other to make it a bigger cookie.
@Elisa: it’s like you’re a child 😉
Congrats on actually making a useful post out of an utterly predictable product – busting out the side-by-side-by-side was inspired. Pulling out my crystal ball shaped cookie jar…I’m seeing Oreos with multiple stuffing layers in different flavors – not like the triple double with their Big Macish extra cookie layer, just cookie-vanilla layer-chocolate layer-cookie or cookie-chocolate layer-peanut butter layer-cookie. Get with the program Nabisco and roll out the PBJ Oreo with PB filling next to berry burst filling.
($3 each? I saw them last night at a supermarket for $2 a box…still didn’t bother getting them, never mind the fact that I _did_ grab a bag of Ranch Dipped Hot Wings Doritos that I hadn’t come across before and a box of Peanut Butter Toast Crunch thanks to the rave reviews on junk food blogs)
@Dana: OMG, that IS genius. Just having two layers of creme, different flavors, in one two cookie sandwich. I’m not even joking – how has no one done that yet??? It can’t be that hard, right? And PB and Berry burst in one cookie? Double genius. I’m shaking with the thought of it.
Yeah, I thought it was brilliant, but a simple search of “PBJ Oreo” returns all sorts of hits of people making their own 🙂
@Dana: Holy cow, who knew??? Thank you, Google…
I am offended by your remarks at the beginning of this review. I am a life long suffer of abuse by the creme lovers who judge me for my love of the cookie and loathing hate of the creme. Its just rude to assume everyone likes the creme.
@Sharon: I cannot endorse the persecution of cookie lovers. My apologies 😉
I too prefer just the wafers! The creme is too sweet and I can only eat a few before getting overwhelmed. But the wafers? If I didn’t stop myself, I could probably eat them, one after another till the whole box was gone.
If Nabisco ever made wafer-only Oreos I would buy the store out, yep.
I’m one of the few who prefer the cookie over the creme. I wish they made Half-Stuff Oreos. The cookie isn’t flavorless. The creme is just sugar suspended in shortening with perhaps a dash of vanilla.
When I get around to reviewing these, the marks won’t be good.
@E.Noms – Half stuffs!!! Sort of Genius, Noms – gotta admit. Make it happen!
Hey! I see I am WAAAAY behind but I was wondering about these, looked um up and found your comments. I think they look yummy & wish I could find some but most of all I throughly enjoyed reading all of the comments! Very funny! Thanks so much for the laugh; I needed that more than the cookies!!! 🙂
@Jill: Thanks for reading! That’s my only goal – to make you all smile 🙂 And to eat junk food. 😉 Spread the word!