Junk Food Nation, I’m not a detective, but I do have a great BS-meter in one situation. My BS-meter rings loud and clear, and I don’t even need to activate it – it triggers reflexively.  And that situation is: whether you saw the game last night. Which game? Doesn’t matter. Most likely some NFL or MLB event, when I listen to or am part of a situation where the conversation begins, “Did you see the game last night?” I can immediately tell whether you are lying about seeing the game last night. 99% of the time.

Why is my BS-meter so strong? Two reasons: (1) Because *I* saw the game last night, and I can tell you did not, or (2) because I know enough about sports to sense trigger words which indicate that what is coming out of your mouth is complete and utter doo-doo.

I bring this up because I was on the subway this morning listening to three dudes, age 35-55, trying (PAINFULLY) to discuss the Colts-Eagles game last night.  I watched this game. They did not. Yet somehow, each of the three tried to convince the other three that they DID watch the game last night. I have no idea what they hoped to gain from this.  Let me point out a few BS things they said:

Dude 1: “Hey did you watch Monday Night Football last night?
Dude 2: “Yeah I caught a little bit of it…ah…Colts, right?”
JFG: Whaddya mean, “Colts, right?” If you watched the game, why the hell are you asking for confirmation as to WHO WAS PLAYING. You’ve got to be kidding me.

Dude 2: “Yeah, I watched it off and on.  Saw that one play that that running back made…it was awesome.”
JFG: This is the equivalent of when you realize the people on the news aren’t actually saying anything at all.

Dude 3: “Oh I turned it off before it was over…who won?”
Dude 2: *PANICKED LOOK*
Dude 1: “The, ah…the Colts came back to win it…right?”
Dude 2: *checking phone* “No…ah right, I remember the Eagles won on a last second field goal.”
Dude 1: “OH right, the Eagles I meant…the green team.”
JFG: The GREEN team?  Holy S. You’re not fooling anyone pretending like you’re checking texts on your phone – I KNOW YOU’RE LOOKING UP A BOX SCORE.

Dude 3: “Eagles! Nice…Lesean McCoy, he’s so quick, right?”
Dude 1 and Dude 2: *nodding profusely*
JFG: Wow. Clear desperation at trying to find common ground to relate to one another with. Lesean McCoy is quick.  Someone get TMZ; this guy is breaking news all over the place.

Look, I’ve been guilty of some of this stuff, and sometimes it’s innocuous… I’ve fallen asleep during some games and missed big things, or you’re not paying attention or you forget what happened because plays blur together if it’s not YOUR team playing. I get it. But in an era where sports fanaticism is at an all-time high, you can’t really go around pretending anymore. Just admit you didn’t see the game and move on.

And stop driving me crazy with this stuff; I have playoff baseball to watch soon.  The …ah…Yankees…they’re still in it?  That…that Ichiro. He’s so quick, right?

Today’s junk food: Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax!

Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax: The Money Shot

I love Lay’s Stax and have reviewed PLENTY of this blog. Now, Lay’s has a new flavor: Korean BBQ Stax!  Wait, is this why my Do Us A Flavor suggestion of “Korean Double Fried Chicken” didn’t make the final cut?? Damn you, Lays! It would’ve been awesome!

Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax: What the hell is that

Now look – I’ve had a lot of Korean BBQ and I’m not sure what is pictured here.  Is it Galbi? Bulgogi?  Why the hell then does it look like a gigantic steak and not cut up pieces o’ meat? Unless that’s supposed to be an uncut rack of short ribs…but if so, show the bone so I KNOW that.  Otherwise…this looks nothing like the Korean BBQ I have come to know and love.  The random sprinkling of green onion of top is kind of weird too.

Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax: 140 per serving

Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax: BEEF FAT

Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax contain all the buzz words – onion powder, molasses, and BEEF FAT. Yum yums.

Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax: Super powdered

When I opened up these Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax, I could smell the distinct smell of sort of a sweet beef.  Not quite bulgogi barbecue beef smell….but definitely beefy.  There was plenty of powder of the thick Stax chip.  I licked a chip, and the flavor was definitely beefy and sort of sweet, but it still had that sort of bouillon-like flavor.  Hmmm.

Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax: close up

When I munched a couple of these Lay’s Korean BBQ Stax chips all at once, the flavor I got wasn’t bad – tasted like beef bouillon with a little bit of fatty roundness.  I wasn’t expecting to get a bibimbop flavor or anything (sorry if some of these words make no sense to some of you; I’m clearly focusing on people who have had Korean BBQ before), but I WAS expecting to get more sweetness from the beef flavor…and I didn’t.  There was a TINY bit of sweetness, but to separate itself, flavor-wise, I would’ve upped the sweetness more to really drive home the Korean BBQ flavor.

But Lay’s didn’t, and the soy flavor was very low.  These didn’t taste bad, as I’ve munched almost the whole container, but to me these didn’t taste like Korean BBQ.  Not my favorite. Sorry, Lay’s.

PURCHASED AT: Walmart, Germantown, MD

COST: $1.18

Thoughts? Please comment below or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. I also have Google+!! Let’s hang out.

Sincerely,

Junk Food Guy