His music is still sampled today.  Listen to this:

Recognize that beat? Recognize the hook at 1:40? No? Maybe this’ll jog your memory:

Sound familiar, especially at 1:00?  And this is just one example of sampling of the Godfather of Go-Go’s music. (Incidentally, Nelly, where have you disappeared to? You still rockin’ that band-aid somewhere?)

Anyways, RIP Chuck Brown.  DC misses you already.

Today’s junk food: Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin’ BBQ Potato Chips!

Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin' BBQ: The Money Shot

Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin' BBQ: Chipotle Peppers and a bowl of something (brown sugar?) in the background.

Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin' BBQ: Dipping BBQ chips into beef and cheddar sauce? Wow.

Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin' BBQ: Ah, its nice to see MSG so prominently featured.

Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin' BBQ: UM what? Chip-shaped wolves? Horrible similes, Ruffles.

Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin' BBQ: The Answer? Beef and Cheddar Dip and Smokehouse Bacon Dip. The question, Alex, is what will kill you slowly and deliciously?

Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin' BBQ: Again, gigantic ridges and lots of flavor powder.

Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin' BBQ: Lots of powder caked right on.

Purchased at the Walmart SuperCenter, the same place I found the Rainbow “Shure Bert” Oreos in, these Ruffles Ultimate Sweet & Smokin’ BBQ chips were like the Kickin’ Jalapeno Ranch Ruffles I tried yesterday – thick and coarse.

The chip had thick and deep ridges, and were larger than normal sized potato chips. Like yesterday, I really could only fit one chip into my mouth at once. Which is crazy, because I have a big friggin mouth.  But I digress – these seemed even CRUNCHIER than the Kickin’ Jalapeno Ranch variety, which I’m sure was just a mental illusion.

Flavor-wise, I gotta be honest – nothing special. If you like BBQ chips, these were tasty and sweet, with a little bit of heat. But otherwise, these were standard BBQ flavor – nothing more smoky than normal (at least to me) and not crazy spicy – just a little heat.  Pretty standard flavor, on a bigger chip.

I’m not crazy about BBQ chips, so I’d prob pass on these in the future, but if you like BBQ flavored things, I think you’ll like these.

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

He looked so normal too!  And I like alcohol, but 7:45am in the morning? Now THAT’S impressive. Way to self-medicate on the way to work, Matthew Fox.  Try not to let anyone flatline on the operating table, OK, Dr. Shephard? Of course, I guess it’s no worse than baseball players playing America’s Game while high on LSD:

“OOO, I just caught a touchdown,” indeed.  My question for the day for you, Junk Food Nation is: have YOU ever been drunk at work?  Let me know in the comments below. And then I’ll forward it to your HR rep.

Today’s junk food: Ruffles Ultimate Kickin’ Jalapeno Ranch!

Ruffles Ultimate Kickin' Jalapeno Ranch: The Money Shot

My sister let me know about these, so I went to my local CVS and picked up a bag of Ruffles Ultimate Kickin’ Jalapeno Ranch. What’s ultimate about them? Well, the bag has a pattern of metal tracks, like how sheet metal looks – that’s pretty ultimate, no?  (zzzzzzzzzzzzz).

Is the ultimate the bigger ridges?

PepsiCo’s has a press release regarding these Ruffles Ultimate Kickin’ Jalapeno Ranch and others in the line:

“Guys live for larger-than-life moments that fuel legendary stories they share for years,” explained Tony Matta, vice president of marketing, Frito-Lay North America. “Male bonding is a rite of passage for guys, and what better way to bond than by attending one of the most exciting parties on the planet. The Ruffles Ultimate line was created to fuel epic moments. It’s in moments like these, often over a bag of chips, where recounting the tale is almost as fun as being there the first time.”

Yeah….I have no words.

Really? Dropping a Carson City reference?

I really don’t get the Carson City reference, either.  Someone help me out here.

FritoLay has these chips listed on their site along with other Ultimate Flavors. My friends over at The Impulsive Buy and the Fat Guy Food Blog have also talked about these chips, recently.

I like how they branded the jalapeno seasoning in the ingredients

I enjoy Jalapeno snacks, but they are always done so differently. Is there going to be too much onion and garlic powder flavor? Will the jalapeno be just a spice, or will it be more vegetable-y? Ruffles Ultimate Kickin’ Jalapeno Ranch, you will be judged.

These are bigger ridges, but how different than Wavy Lays?

Ruffles Ultimate Kickin’ Jalapeno Ranch does have really REALLY big ridges, but these remind me of Wavy Lays – nothing that I haven’t seen before.  I will acknowledge that the ridges are DEEPER than Wavy Lays. Still, not sure what to make of it yet.

As I crunched into one of these chips, I noticed that structurally, these WERE different than any previous ridged potato chips I’d had.  Because the ridges were so deep, I really could only fit one chip into my mouth at a given time (which is a change), and a full sized chip with these ridges was a mouthful anyways.  The texture was different too – more crunchy and coarse, less crispy.  Which was kinda cool. While they still had a good potato taste, the steep ridges required more chewing.

Decent amount of powder

But what about the actual flavor of these Ruffles Ultimate Kickin’ Jalapeno Ranch? Well, they aren’t my new favorite, but I thought they were pretty good.  The jalapeno taste was more vegetable-y than not, although these weren’t spicy at all.  Basically, I got jalapeno flavor with a minuscule kick. And then quickly the ranch flavor took over, cool and creamy – standard.

And that’s basically it.  A solid chip with decent flavor.  Overall, the reason I can’t give it higher marks is because…well, I thought the flavors would be BOLDER.  After the Doritos JACKED experiences, I figured Frito-Lay would up the ante here too.  Structurally, yes. Flavor wise…not so much.

The commenters on the Impulsive Buy site HATED this chip.  I am more in line with the Fat Guy Food Blog’s opinion: That the whole thing is more just a spicy ranch flavor than anything else.  I’d eat these again.

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

Making double into Dough-ble...soooort of a stretch

Evidence that Ben and Jerry’s releases different flavors abroad than they do in the US.  Either that and this is some outdated 2010 flavor that is only now reaching the British Isles.  I swear, Ireland was a couple weeks ahead of us in terms of movies, but two years behind us in terms of TV.  They were just getting the Season Premiere of New Girl.

PS: This ice cream description is awesome, and makes me believe that at the center of the entire ice cream tub is some kind of large core of soft fudge.  Amazing. I should’ve bought this.

Coconut Ice Cream? Need.

Coconutterly Fair is another such flavor.  As a lover of coconut, we need this flavor in the US now, please! And a coconut bouncing off the head of a dazed cow?  Genius!

BTW, what is the reference in the name of this ice cream? Come on, you etymology experts, help me out.

Fruit of the Forest, eh?

Got this at breakfast in my hotel. In the United States, this would be called Mixed Berry. Calling it Forest Fruits makes this feel like its Yogurt from the Lord of the Rings or Hunger Games or something.

So specific!

I’ve never seen the TYPE of apple specified on a product before.  But this is a good thing, maybe – in the US things would be generically called “apple,” but since Bramley Apples are indigenous to the British Isles, they’re showing some home country pride.  I dig.

Pink-boxed microwave Indian food, in the same breath as...

...Filo Prawns and Mini Sugared Donuts???

Dunnes was the name of the grocery store I found many of these items in, and their store-brand line of frozen/fridge foods was very interesting.  First, I think the party pink boxes are chuckle-worthy. Next, such a random variety of items – from Indian food to Filo-wrapped shrimp to mini sugar donuts.  And finally, the suggestion that serving all these food items at once creates a Perfect Party?  I love it.

Ah, yes. Is that salsa on the burger?

BIG EAT indeed.  Nothing wrong with just putting it out there.  Big Al’s Big Eat…but 6 oz???? That’s hilarious.  In the US, a 1 lb. burger is SORT OF a big eat.  6 oz? Less than 1/2 lb.?  Psssh-shaw.

Unsure if this is offensive

I was just confused by this. What ARE Mexican Wedges? In all the Mexican restaurants I’ve eaten at, I don’t ever remember getting a side of potato wedges.  And more than that…are the cacti in the background representative of the Mexican horizon?  Hmmmm.

This IS a happy mix

Nothing like a medley box of ice cream treats!  Happy Mix is just that – full of mini versions of all your favorite and well known ice cream brands!  Magnum!  And….er…Cornetto?  …..Twister? Mini Milk?  I’ve never heard of these brands; what the heck is going on here??

Funny like I'm a clown? I amuse you?

Goodfella’s Frozen Pizza.  This HAS to be good, right? Except Goodfella’s took place in NYC, not Chicago, so the deep bake is wrong, but I’m being persnickety. I like how the tagline is “The Italian Way.”  I wonder if the developers of this pizza ever watched the movie, for reals.

And we thought the bologna with the olives was bad

Nothing like processed meat and vegetables sliced compressed into a loaf and sliced thin for sandwiches. I was curious how this tasted…sort of.

Luvvly Jubbly indeed!

This treat I liked just because it seemed so fun to say in Harry Potter-voice.  ”Jubbly Ice Lollies!  Luvvly jubbly!” How cheerful!  If I ever get a pug, he’s going to be named Jubbly.

Not sure what the lion is for

Another fun sounding snack. “Wibbly Wibbly Wonder!” Ignoring the random lion cartoon, I was struck by this treat’s boast of a “Yummy Lemon Jelly Centre.” At the center of an ice cream bar??? That’s something I should’ve tried!

Most unhealthy brunch ever.

When I think brunch, I think eggs benedict, waffles, and…the strawberry ice cream bar covered in cookie crumbs.

I guess if you eat five of these...

FEAST. Bold statement for a chocolate ice cream bar covered in chocolate and rice krispies. If I ever own an ice cream company, I’m going to name things like BRUNCH and FEAST. My vanilla line will be called BANQUET and my popsicle line will be called BUFFET.

No...it's just ice cream

I have to say, I actually LOVE calling ice cream sandwiches Icebergers.  It’s no weirder than calling them ice cream sandwiches, frankly. From now on, that’s the term I’m using, and I encourage everyone out there to do the same.  ”Oh, I can’t wait to finish this cheeseburger so I can eat my Iceberger.”

Of course, spelling it Berger makes it sound Austrian. And I’m pretty sure they didn’t have these in the Sound of Music.

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

Hell, I’d pay money to see this movie. “The stage is heating up quickly”?? How can this NOT be a great movie??

“I can beat this guy!” Seriously, the overdone dramatics are perfectly portrayed.  Black20, I give you the slow clap.

Yesterday, Junk Food Nation, I reviewed three of Snacklemouth’s original flavors: Almond Berry, Peanut Cranberry, and Almond Pecan Maple.  Today I tackle (or snackle) their two newest flavors: Salty Chocolate and Bacon Maple!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Salty Chocolate and Bacon Maple: The Money Shots

Yeah – I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think that the boxes for these Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters were creepy at all. In fact they might be even creepier than yesterday’s.  The Bacon Maple one especially.  That one will haunt my dreams for years to come.

These flavors aren’t even available on Snacklemouth’s website, but I’m sure if you were nice and offered to pay Snacklemouth, they’d sell it to you. I feel so special to be able to try it! But enough chit chat. Let’s get to it, leading off with the Salty Chocolate!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Salty Chocolate: The Money Shot

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Salty Chocolate: I must admit, the eys slightly crying chocolate sauce is skeeving me out. The cashew cheeks are funny though.

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Salty Chocolate: I half expected there to be some salt shakers here. Missed opportunity, Snacklemouth!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Salty Chocolate: Me likey adding sea salt - always

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Salty Chocolate: Sea salt should be first!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Salty Chocolate: Ah, the first real sugar I've seen in these snacks (contained in the chocolate)

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Salty Chocolate: exactly how it sounds

Snacklemouth Salty Chocolate Granola Nut Clusters are really really good, with one caveat. First, The granola is again reliable. Slightly sweet with a nice nutty flavor. The cashews and almonds in his mix are crunchy and flavorful.  The sea salt added to the granola REALLY brings out a nice sweet savoriness to the cluster. Add in some really tasty chocolate chips, and you get a really savory-sweet chocolatey salty hearty granola bite (just wanted to see how many adjectives I could fit).

The one caveat?  NEEDS MORE CHOCOLATE! The bites without chocolate outnumbered the bites with, and while those were tasty as well, the bites WITH chocolate were the homeruns.  I imagine I’m just being spoiled, however, wanting tons of chocolate chips with each bite, like you see with store-bought corn syrup laden granola bars.  The reduced number of chips with this one probably keeps the calorie count down. I’m just being a brat, Snacklemouth – this was a great combo!

And now, Snacklemouth’s brand NEWEST flavor, Bacon Maple! You guys know I love pork, and I love maple, so this oughta be god:

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Bacon Maple: The Money Shot

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Bacon Maple: Waffle eyes, porky nose, leaves as mustache along with bacon strips - love it!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Bacon Maple: Who DOESN'T love piggy collar buttons???

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Bacon Maple: COOKED BACON! That's the first time I've ever seen THAT in granola.

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Bacon Maple: Maple and bacon is a match made in heaven

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Bacon Maple: added pork but still the same calorie count as the others...too good.

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Bacon Maple: a porky mishmash of flavor

As soon as you opened these Snacklemouth Bacon Maple Granola Nut Clusters, you can immediately smell the maple flavor and the hint of some smoky porkiness.  Unlike the other flavors, where there were big chocolate chips or dried berries to focus on, the Bacon Maple variety appeared to have little bits of smoked bacon on EVERY cluster.

The taste was still sweet, with maple flavor – my favorite.  Crunchy and hearty like the other granolas, this flavor had ONLY almonds – no other types of nuts.  Each almond was covered in the agave syrup and maple flavor, coated with bits of granola and bacon.  Each bite tasted slightly smoky and a little salty too.  On the occasions when my teeth sank into a large pocket of smoked bacon, the pork flavor immediately emerged almost like I was eating jerky, only to quickly mix with the sweetness of the granola and nuts.  A REALLY interesting combo.  Slightly sweet and meaty at the same time.  Blew my mind.

Both new flavors were very successful in my book. I’d chow on these anytime.  Thanks again to Snacklemouth for making this taste test experience possible!

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

I got 7 of 8!  Not bad, except I massively botched picking Washington over Boston…Boston only finished in 1st place in the Atlantic Division, and Washington had the second worst record in the league.  Yup.

In the West, I chose: Dallas, Memphis, Clippers, Lakers, Golden State, Minnesota, OKC, and Denver. Yeah, 6 of 8 isn’t horrible, but putting in Golden State and Minnesota over San Antonio and Utah feel slike a major mistake in hindsight.  I even said the Spurs were too old.  They only tied for the best record in the entire league.  Ouch.

Still, guessing 13 of 16 playoff teams isn’t bad. I’ll revisit my predictions as the playoffs progress.

Today’s junk food may be the healthiest snack food I’ve eaten so far, with apologies to Snikiddy and Popcorn, Indiana.  The kind folks at Snacklemouth reached out and sent me a sample box of their products – five different flavors of their healthy granola nut clusters!  Today I’m going to review three of them: Peanut Cranberry, Almond Berry, and Almond Pecan Maple.

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Peanut Cranberry, Almond Berry, Almond Pecan Maple: The Money Shots

GAAAAH!  I know.  When I opened this box, it scared the shit out of me too.  As someone who doesn’t LOVE clowns or things that smile too much, these boxes definitely gave me the heebie jeebies.  Still, how could I be scared when they potentially contained deliciousness??

Snacklemouth is a funny word, too. For some reason, it reminds me of the Alice in Wonderland poem, regarding the Jabberwocky:

One, two! One, two! And through and through
   The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!

Snacklemouth: The Rundown

The back of each of these Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters boxes contains this really cool description of the company’s origin.  Makes sense that these healthy granola snacks would come from a place like Denver, CO, what with their beautiful scenery and perfect hiking conditions.  So jelly over here.

Anyways, let’s get started.  I’ll kick it of with the Peanut Cranberry Snacklemouth.

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Peanut Cranberry: The Money Shot

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Peanut Cranberry: THOSE EYES. Surrounded by a peanut shell, and dotted with cranberries...CREEPY

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Peanut Cranberry: Beard made of cranberry juice?

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Peanut Cranberry: Fresh roasted nuttiness exploding with berry flavor. Sounds good to me!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Peanut Cranberry: Plainly listed ingredients for all to see. Brown Rice Syrup sounds tasty.

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Peanut Cranberry: Contains Peanuts, people!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Peanut Cranberry: Big thick clusters!

The first thing you’ll notice about these Snacklemouth Peanut Cranberry Granola Nut Clusters is that they are crunchy and not very sweet…which is nice.  The agave syrup they use instead of sugar provides some nice sweetness, but there is no sugary taste to this granola. Usually when you eat a granola bar it’s loaded with syrup – this is reminiscent of Bear Naked Granola, which I also enjoy.

You get an immediate peanut buttery taste from the salty peanuts that makes the entire granola cluster taste a little sweet/savory. And then when you hit a nice juicy plump dried cranberry, it kind of tastes like a PB&J, to be honest. Very hearty, and the occasional almond gives this flavor many different layers. You definitely get more peanut taste with these than cranberry taste.

Next up: Almond Berry Snacklemouth!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Berry: The Money Shot

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Berry: Eyes rimmed in almonds and brow fitted with blueberries...how tribal.

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Berry: Nothing like a blueberry dotted bowtie

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Berry: yumminess collides with almonds and blueberries, apparently

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Berry: Oh this contains cranberries too? NICE.

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Berry: Contains ALMONDS, people!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Berry: nice full clusters of cran, blue, and almond

With this flavor of Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters, I immediately got the taste of dried blueberries before anything else.  Distinctly sweet and somewhat tart, the dried blue berries mixed with the flavor of the granola and almonds quite well.  As the flavor of the dried blueberries faded, then the round nuttiness of the almond would emerge.  Don’t get me wrong – there were plenty of almonds in this batch. But I felt like even with clusters that appeared to have NO blue berries (or cranberries), I still got the sweet taste of blueberries with each bite.  These were really good.

And finally: Almond Pecan Maple Snacklemouth!

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Pecan Maple: The Money Shot

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Pecan Maple: LOL to the maple leaf eyelashes

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Pecan Maple: Nice touch with the syrupy beard, the golden maple leaf, and the lumberjack collar

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Pecan Maple: Maple is one of my favorite flavors, so I'm excited to see how this fits

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Pecan Maple: ...I don't see maple syrup anywhere...hmmmm

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Pecan Maple: ...maybe the Maple is in the "Natural Flavors?"

Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters: Almond Pecan Maple: Thick cuts of oats with pecan and raisins and maple

This variety of Snacklemouth Granola Nut Clusters was probably my favorite of the three.  As soon as I opened the package, the sweet sweet smell of pecan pie came wafting out.  And I LOVE me some pecan pie.

Keep in mind that ALL of these granola nut clusters are still only flavored with agave syrup.  Still, as I chewed these Almond Pecan Clusters, I was amazed at how sweet this was.  Maybe it was the combo of the raisins and pecans, but this cluster combo was really tasty. The combo of pecans and almonds gave these clusters a real hearty nuttiness that complemented the granola really well.  Throw in the raisins and dried crans and you had the perfect balance of nut and berry.  Unlike the previous two flavors, where I felt the balance was shifted to one side or another, this variety was in perfect balance.

Really really good.  I rank them (3) Peanut Cranberry, (2) Almond Berry, and (1) Almond Pecan.  Thanks to Snacklemouth for giving me a chance to try these!  The final two (new) flavors tomorrow!

Any thoughts? Tell me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

(1) According to Alexa.com, this blog is visited most frequently by females who are in the age range 35-44 that are college educated.  Nice!  Happy Mother’s Day to my own mom, and to all the wonderful moms out there!  You do too much, and deserve more than just one day to be recognized.

(2) The NHL Playoffs are officially done for me, as the Rangers beat the Caps 2-1 to take Game 7 last night.  I guess between LA, Phoenix, New York, and New Jersey, I’ll root for…the Oklahoma City Thunder.

(3) Today is a big day in the (my) baseball world: The Return of Andy Pettitte! You guys know Andy Pettitte, right? Pettitte, who won five World Series with the Yanks.  Pettitte, who had the best pickoff move in baseball.  Pettitte, who admitted to using HGH and is currently a witness in the federal case against Roger Clemens.  Pettitte, who retired in 2010 and now, at age 39, is attempting a comeback with the Yanks.  Well, all I can say is with the New York rotation the way it is – Welcome Back, Andy.

So weeks ago, a Twitter follower named King Rhino sent a message that Oreo was going to be coming out with a raspberry sherbet Golden Oreo very soon.  Later, my friend The Impulsive Buy covered the release of this cookie, noting that they could only be found at Walmart SuperCenters. The release of these new Limited Edition Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos coincided with the return of the Limited Edition Creamsicle Oreo, which I’ve already reviewed on this blog.

There was a stretch of time when I didn’t know that these Oreos were only available at Walmart SuperCenters where I called every Giant Food, Safeway, Harris Teeter, Walmart, and Target in a 20 mile radius to find these damn cookies – and no one had them!  So, I decided to finally make the trek.  The nearest Walmart SuperCenter…24 miles away. I called ahead: they had them. The Junk Food Gal and I went bounding down the highway to get these cookies!  That’s dedication, folks.

Once at the GIGANTIC Walmart Supercenter, I immediately made a beeline to the cookie aisle where, GASP! THEY WEREN’T THERE.  No sales associate could help me. I was furious – LIES LIES LIES! I waited in line for customer service, fuming, about to explode, when the Junk Food Gal called…”I found them.”

The first time I've ever seen a Seasonal aisle

SEASONAL???? What kind of aisle is Seasonal???? I’ve never seen anything like this before.  Imagine all the Xmas stuff, the Easter stuff, etc. goes into this aisle…is this where all the Limited Edition stuff goes too? Not really because the rest of the aisle was just filled with stacks of regular Pringles and soda.  Weird.

Nevertheless, the Limited Edition Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos were there!  And now, the first full review of them EVER! (Well, according to Google, at least )

Limited Edition Rainbow "Shure, Bert!" Ice Cream Oreos: The Money Shot

Limited Edition Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos, how I’ve longed for you. Dreamed about you. Made out with you, in those dreams.  And now you are finally mine. In all your “two cookies = 150 calories” glory.

Oreo has done Ice Cream flavors in the past, with Creamsicle and Berry Burst Ice Cream. Tackling rainbow sherbet is interesting though – the last time I remember eating rainbow sherbet was with my father in our local mall when I was like nine years old.  I hope these hold up, after ….a lot of years.

Not actual ice cream

Limited Edition Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos are not actually ice cream.  I know this sounds simple, but while I was calling all those grocery stores, so many employees went to go find them and came back on the line, telling me they couldn’t find it in the frozen food section. No matter how many different ways I described the cookies, and indicated they were NOT ice cream, the frozen food aisle was where everyone went to check first.  Zounds.

Is this a Sesame Street reference?

These are not Limited Edition Sherbet Ice Cream Oreos, they are Limited Edition Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos. What does the “Shure, Bert!” reflect? Is it Sesame Street’s Ernie saying, “Shure, Bert!”? That’s my immediate thought…except NO WHERE ELSE on this package is Sesame Street even referenced?  What the hell, Oreo?? What’re you going for here?

Ingredient no. 1: SUGAR

Hey I thought Kraft Foods was supposed to be renamed Mondelez??? Limited Edition Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos, get with the times!

Smells like heaven

As soon as I opened this package of Limited Edition Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos up, I’ll be damned if the smell of rainbow sherbet didn’t fill the air.  These rows of golden cookies with purple and green creme smelled the part, for sure.  Or, for Shure.

MMMM artificial coloring

Raspberry and Lime Sherbet...creme

Limited Edition Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos presumably contain a mix of purplish raspberry sherbet creme and light green lime sherbet creme.  I tried tasting these cremes separately, and honestly, there was indeed a distinct flavor to each creme!  The green was more citrusy and lime-y, and the purple was softer and had a rounder berry flavor. Maybe my mind was seeking those distinctions and so created them in my head, but I swear I tasted it.

NOM NOM NOM

I crunched on a couple of Limited Edition Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos, and I must say, Oreo did a great job here.  The rainbow sherbet flavor was on point, and matched REALLY well with the Golden Oreo.  Sweet and fruity, the creme was so light it felt like the icey lightness of rainbow sherbet.  Paired with the not-overpowering sweetness of the Golden Oreo, this was like getting a bite of rainbow sherbet with a piece of the waffle cone, all in one mouthful.

Back when the Creamsicle Oreos first came out, I HATED on them.  But these Rainbow “Shure, Bert!” Ice Cream Oreos I LOVED.  Release these everywhere, please.  And if you’re crazy like me and can make the trek to find a Walmart SuperCenter, I recommend these.

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

On the way back from Ireland, a bag of chips I had inflated until it was tight and about to burst.  It looked like this:

Tight like my belly.

At 35,000 feet, this chip bag looked like it was about to bust open.  It felt like a balloon.  And I was trying to remember why… I figured it had something to do with the pressure inside the bag being much higher than the pressure outside the bag, caused by the fact that air pressure is much lower at 35,000 feet than at sea level. But doesn’t a plane stabilize the air pressure somewhat? I’m lost here.  Someone help! Post the explanation in the comments below – PLEASE! I’m getting stupider by the minute.

While in Ireland, I was struck by the number of meat-flavored snacks.  Beef flavored chips, etc.  I even saw these:

Taytos Chickatees

I’m PRETTY sure these are just chicken flavored corn puffs.  Wow.  Had these not been a six pack I probably would’ve purchased these to review.  Chicken-flavored Cheetos??? Only in Ireland.

These Taytos Chickatees were not the chicken snack I chose to review – Instead, I bought something I’d been DYING to try before I even went overseas: Walkers Roast Chicken Potato Crisps!

Walkers Roast Chicken Potato Crisps: The Money Shot

Meat flavored chips are always tough.  As I found out with the Prawn Cocktail chips, sometimes these companies design these chips to taste like the condiments that are applied to meat – for example, making “Baby Back Rib” chips taste more like barbecue sauce than meat.  Would these Walkers Roast Chicken Potato Crisps hold up, and actually taste like meat?

Nothing I like more than crispy chicken skin

Or would these Walkers Roast Chicken Potato Crisps taste like something else? Rosemary and thyme. Maybe they’d have a bouillon cube taste. Or best of all, maybe they’d taste like the greasy crispy chicken skin that I love!

I love chicken skin so much that when I roast a chicken, I will often eat all the chicken skin first. THEN any flabby pieces of chicken skin…I’ll put in a frying fan and RE-FRY to make crispy. AMAZING.

How is this a grab bag??

Walkers Roast Chicken Potato Crisps came in a normal bag the size of …well something you’d get out of a vending machine.  I wasn’t sure how this was a GRAB BAG.  Of course, this probably reflects that I have a pretty warped view of what a GRAB BAG should be.  To me a GRAB BAG is big enough to feed a family.

MMMM flavouring

Walkers Roast Chicken Potato Crisps has chicken seasoning, but the chicken seasoning contains no mention of chicken except for presumably the “flavouring.”  I feel like the British are skirting some kind of health laws here.

Crispy crisps!

I stuck my nose into the opened Walkers Roast Chicken Potato Crisps bag, and breathed deep: and it smelled like chicken!  Like, for reals, yo – this smelled like the chicken that you just pulled out of the oven.  I was beside myself. It actually smelled like roast chicken, with all the hints of smoky roast.  Walkers, +1.

Just like the skin of a chicken

I chewed some Walkers Roast Chicken Potato Crisps, and the verdict: I must say, this is closest I think I’ve ever tasted a chip coming close to real meat.  Really incredible – the chip itself, as I’ve described before is nice and flaky. And the flavor is spot on. I immediately get the briny chicken flavor mixed with what seems like a bit of rosemary and thyme spice. The more I savored and chewed these crisps, the more the roast chicken flavor came out – slightly smoky and had that slight tang that rosemary-infused chicken stock has.

Walkers, bravo with this one.  You’ve taken the top seed with meat-flavored chips, for sure.

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

The Dublin airport SPAR

SPAR is a British Isles-based convenience store chain, similar to 7-11, Wawa, or Sheetz.  As I chuckled at the name of the shop, I stopped, realizing that in the US we have convenience stores called 7-11, Wawa, and Sheetz.  Hmm.

Full of possibilities

I realized upon stepping into this store that the entire country was going to be a gold mine, in terms of this blog. Weird snacks, funny sounding items, interesting flavors – stores like SPAR, and later, EuroGiant and Dunnes Grocery would provide endless material. And who doesn’t enjoy laughing at another country’s expense? I know I do. I mean, if I can chortle about there being blue bubble gum soda here in the US, then I can certainly guffaw at Prawn Cocktail chips, right?

That IS hunky dory!

Of course, I also realized right away that I wouldn’t be able to BUY everything I saw or wanted to talk about. In many cases, it was because even though the packaging and names were funny, the flavors were probably predictable, not unlike things we had here in the US.  Or the item itself would’ve been a pain in the ass to bring back.  Or they were just too gross and I didn’t WANT to try them.

Anyways, the following is just a small sampling of things I saw in Ireland that were not purchased.  We’ll revisit this topic again, soon, not to worry.

Bison-flavor! Oh, wait.

I loved this because of the picture of the Buffalo. I wonder if they know that in the US, Buffalo-flavored things usually have a picture of a hot sauce bottle.  Unless these really WERE bison-flavored, in which case I certainly missed out.

1 of my 5 WHAT a day?

Heinz is apparently a big company in Ireland, as every single tomato based product had the Heinz label on it.  Including this treat above – spaghetti in a can, PLUS sausages.  Well, thank God its PLUS sausages, because this would’ve been gross WITHOUT the sausages, right?  While I realize this is probably similar to Chef Boyardee, I can’t help but imagine noodles in ketchup here.

Better than Nutella?

Makes sense – butter up a piece of toast, and then sprinkle on bacon bits and dried mushrooms.  Hey whatever, I’ve eaten weirder things on toast.  Dried mushrooms throws me a little, but I might start making Bacos sandwiches tomorrow.

Ah, the jar o' noodle hoops. MMMMM

Spaghetti-Os? In a jar? By Heinz? I mean, I guess….sidenote, this “Fridge Pack” was not in the fridge at all.  The yellow colored jar is throwing me off too. I am now imagining Spaghetti-Os in mustard.

Worst salad dressing ever

Gross – I never ever want to try a dressing called Salad Cream.  Especially a Chef’s Salad Cream.  That little chef on the bottle is grinning too much.

Gummy confusion

This gummy candy is only 1.50 euros!  But what the hell is it??? I get that gummies have taken on random shapes through the ages – but Shrimp and Bananas???? How is that a combination that even makes sense? Shrimp can’t peel bananas with those tiny arms.  Let’s get real here, people.

Cadbury, what are you TALKING about?

These Crunchie Rocks were apparently solid cookie lumps covered in some sort of toffee or sugar.  Sort of like your store bought version of no-bake cookies.  I don’t understand, however, the design element of putting them inside a glass ball and adding the tagline “Shake things up this winter.” First of all, what? Can these only be eaten in the winter?  Do I need to wait until winter and then break these out to shake things up?

Also, is this treat going to change my life or something?  ”I was going to be a lawyer until I ate some Crunchie Rocks, I shook things up, and now I’m a surfing instructor” – that sort of thing?

Simplicity is sometimes best

Welp, that’s simple enough. If this can were clear you’d see eight dogs standing upright in salty liquid. Excuse me while I retch.

So glamorous

KIMBERLY!  Er…KimberLEY, I mean.  I like the move here.  Forget the plural!  No Jaffa Cakes, no Digestives – go for the singular name like the Miami Heat, the Utah Jazz.  I’m eating KIMBERLEY! (pause for childish laughter and rib nudging).

Sidenote: I realize that technically Oreos are just OREO on the package, so maybe people say they are eating Kimberleys.  Still sounds dirty.

Why not indeed?

These chocolate cereal bars just taunt you directly. “Why not” buy this product? “Why not” mix chocolate and orange? “Why not,” you loser? I’m waiting for Jacob’s to release it’s next generation of cereal bar, called, “YOU CAN AFFORD IT.”

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

1838 – John Wilkes Booth, American actor and assassin of Abraham Lincoln

1930 – Pat Summerall, American football player and broadcaster

1955 – Chris Berman, American sportscaster

1957 – Sid Vicious, English bassist (The Sex Pistols)

1960 – Bono, Irish singer (U2)

And of course….My sister!  Well, one of my two sisters, that is.  Happy Birthday shout-out from the Junk Food Guy! Woot!  (I like pretending I matter.  Cough.)

Anyways, onto the the junk food.  While I was in Ireland, I saw plenty of snacks that I thought looked interesting.  For example, these:

But...we have chipotle chips here in the US

I didn’t buy them, of course, because well, frankly, we have chipotle chips here in the US too – how much different could these be? And that happened a lot abroad.  A snack would have a funny shape, or a funny name, or a funny picture on the packaging that made it ridiculous…but when it really came down to it, it wasn’t a big jump from what we already had here in the good ole states.

Of course, then I stumbled upon Walkers Sensations Caramelised Onion & Balsamic Vinegar Flavour Crisps!

Walkers Sensations Caramelised Onion & Balsamic Vinegar Flavour Crisps: The Money Shot

I have to admit, these are not two flavors I would’ve ever put together OUTSIDE of a chip flavor, much less ON a potato chip.  So when I saw these Walkers Sensations Caramelised Onion & Balsamic Vinegar Flavour Crisps, I knew that I had to review these.  I mean…do people put caramelized onions and balasmic vinegar on burgers or something? I’ve never heard of it.

Apparently, having Googled this combo, this recipe happens a lot (?) and people like the combo on pizza (?????) Whatever, weirdos.

That is some sensational design

Walkers Sensations Caramelised Onion & Balsamic Vinegar Flavour Crisps looks sensational, doesn’t it? The sleek black bag, the flowery white piping…how regal.  Sort of. Although the use of an S instead of a Z is TILTING ME.

These...are not two flavors I'd expect to go together

I do like the pretty blunt display of the flavor profile on this bag of Walkers Sensations Caramelised Onion & Balsamic Vinegar Flavour Crisps.  Big ole red onion and a pitcher of vinegar.

The Sensations line came out in 2002 when Walkers decided it wanted to the up the ante over the likes of Prawn Cocktail chips and develop some crisps along the more refined palette-line. Indeed, Walkers calls them “posh” chips, with such flavors as Lamb & Mint, and Lime & Coriander Chutney.  Wow.  Didn’t see any of these in Ireland.

Love the description. Thank you.

Walkers Sensations Caramelised Onion & Balsamic Vinegar Flavour Crisps lays it all out for you – this tastes like onion and then it tastes like vinegar.  Simple as that. I am curious though. I love sour cream and onion chips, but these aren’t sour cream and onion – these are just plain ole onion. And I’ve had just plain onion powder before… and it was a little strong. How would these be?

Now these are some ingredients that don't seem complicated at all

I know the font’s small, but these Walkers Sensations Caramelised Onion & Balsamic Vinegar Flavour Crisps contain dried onion and balsamic vinegar, and appear to be suitable for vegetarians.  Unless you’re allergic to celery. Plus, I like how they add paprika just for color. That’s a nice touch

Crunchier than standard Walkers Crisps

Upon opening this bag of Walkers Sensations Caramelised Onion & Balsamic Vinegar Flavour Crisps, the onion smell was IMMENSE.  Holy cow – I mean, this was like putting your nose right up to a bag of onions and taking a BIG WHIFF.  WOOOOO.  This is what someone’s breath smells like after eating a bag of onions.  Duder.

More like US potato chips

I took a big fingerful of these Walkers Sensations Caramelised Onion & Balsamic Vinegar Flavour Crisps and crunched.  First, the texture of these crisps was different than regular Walkers Crisps.  For one, these weren’t as light and flaky and, well, crispy.  These were a little thicker and basically felt more like the texture of US-made potato chips. Not crunchy, per se, but had a more substantial bite than a traditional Walkers Crisp.

The taste of caramelized onion hits you right away.  RIGHT AWAY. These were sweet and onion-y right off the bat, and they didn’t skimp on the onion flavor.  These were pretty interesting – at first there wasn’t much savoriness to this – it was just a strong sweet onion flavor.  Then all of a sudden the extreme tang and sour of the balsamic vinegar came rushing forth, and made my lips pucker ever so slightly. The sweetness of the vinegar was sort of unexpected since I didn’t taste it at first.  Very odd.

This chip definitely had two halves of taste – you start out tasting the sweet onion and then end it with the tang of balsamic vinegar.  The combo? To me, it was unusual, but I can SORT of see how they worked together.  I mean, I liked them – the flavor was just so curious I couldn’t stop eating them.

A definite try if you’re ever in the British Isles.

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

In Ireland, unsurprisingly, everything was soccer and rugby.  All the time. Eight to nine channels devoted to it.  I know soccer is the world’s sport, and I enjoy it too – but I couldn’t help but roll my eyes as EVERY SINGLE CHANNEL I FLIPPED TO WAS SOCCER.  And then, once in a BLUE MOON there would be some B-grade footage of what was going on in the NBA playoffs.  Horrible footage. I was watching Lebron shoot a jumper through the glass of a fishtank.

Anyways, I thought I’d just throw out some quick responses to two important sports news items that I missed while cut off from Bristol, CT:

1) Mariano Rivera tears every single muscle in his body during practice: UGH.  As a Yankees fan (hell, as a baseball fan), this news really sucked.  Even Yankee haters I know all cringed when they heard this news.  Arguably the greatest closer of all time in baseball, this year was going to be Mo’s last year, he was going to retire at the top. Now that’ll have to wait another year. Let’s hope he goes out on a decent note, ala Chipper Jones, and not ala Mark Prior.

2) Bryce Harper debut’s for the Nationals: Bryce Harper, the former No. 1 pick, the arrogant, brash outfielder for the Washington Nationals finally debuted while I was gone. He has a weird semi-mohawk/mullet going on. He wears eye black on 40% of his face. And he’s only 19 years old, the youngest player in the majors. Did you hear me? 19!! What were YOU doing when you were 19??? I don’t even wanna think about my 19 year old days. I’m pretty sure weed was involved, but I’m not sure.

Quick note before I get into today’s junk food: Yesterday I reviewed Jaffa Cakes, and apparently a UK based food blog recently did a side-by-side comparison of 12 different brands of Jaffa Cakes! Read about it here.

Today’s junk food: Walkers Prawn Cocktail Potato Chips!

A Walkers Promo poster

I’d been fascinated with Walkers chips ever since my friend Nevin gave me a bag of the Smoky Bacon variety.  On this blog, I’ve only really talked about them a couple times because I never had access. But in Ireland, Walkers and their competitor Taytos were EVERYWHERE.

To recap, Walkers Potato Crisps in the UK/Ireland are basically the same as Lays Potato Chips here in the states; Walkers is owned by the Frito-Lay Corporation.  Walkers and Lays Potato Chips share many similarities in the packaging; notably, the big yellow circle with red sash logo.

We have interesting flavors here in the US (Classic BLT comes to mind) but we have our standard falvors: sour cream and onion, BBQ, etc. Walkers has some “standard” flavors too, but to me they are wacky as hell.  Today’s variety, Walkers Prawn Cocktail Potato Chips, is one of these “standard” flavors.

Walkers Prawn Cocktail Potato Chips: The Money Shot

That’s right, folks, Walkers Prawn Cocktail Potato Chips.  Prawn cocktail.  Wow. What the hell is in this pink bag? I thought this was an unusual flavor, until I saw this:

Pringles on the bandwagon!

PRINGLES TOO?  I guess in the UK and Ireland, Prawn Cocktail is a standard flavor. My head is spinning. At least neither the Pringles can nor the Walkers bag had big shrimp shapes on the packaging.  That might’ve made me retch – and I love seafood too.

So...shrimp cocktail flavor? So pink...

I am really curious how these taste.  I’ve had “shrimp/prawn” chips before, but those were Asian-based. And they mainly tasted like salt and MSG.  But these Walkers Prawn Cocktail Potato Chips?? Hmm…skeptical.

No real indication of the flavor

Walkers Prawn Cocktail Potato Chips contain prawn cocktail seasoning.  O….k…. and the prawn cocktail seasoning contains “flavouring.”  What is this, the roll of stolen microfilm from the movie “The Rock”? Why is everything so vague and hidden???? ANSWER ME: DO THESE TASTE LIKE SHRIMP?

Light and crispy

As soon as I opened the bag of Walkers Prawn Cocktail Potato Chips, I knew exactly what they would taste like. Not prawns themselves – but prawn cocktail. Cocktail sauce. Holy shit. These were chips flavored with cocktail sauce.  These smelled faintly of tomato and horseradish.  My god.

Cocktail sauce flavored!!! WHOA

I placed a large fingerful of Walkers Prawn Cocktail Potato Chips in my mouth and chewed.  WOW.  These were….well, I dunno.  Walkers Crisps were MUCH crispier than US brand chips.  Extremely delicate and flaky while still maintaining good potato taste.  Really tasty on the potato chip front.

The cocktail sauce flavor? It was spot on!  VERY tangy, this was like (and I know this seems totally weird) taking a potato chip, dipping it full on into a bowl of cocktail sauce, and placing it in my mouth. That’s what it tasted like.  Tangy, tomato ketchup-y, and with a hint of the spicy horseradish.  I did not detect any smidge of shrimp flavor – my mouth was immediately overwhelmed by the tanginess of the cocktail sauce flavoring.  The taste was DEAD. ON.

The final question: Did I LIKE these? I DID, but these wouldn’t be my first choice in the future. The reason is simple – I don’t LOVE cocktail sauce.  But I have to imagine other countries look at our salsa flavored chips and think the same thing.  I probably wouldn’t buy these again, but that’s personal choice.  If you’re into cocktail sauce, you’ll LOVE these.

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy